Shipping Crap During the Christmas Season

My least favorite chore during the Christmas season is anything to do with packaging and/or shipping.  Just a few of my observations: 

1) You will find the perfect gift for a special person in your life. You will not find the perfect box to ship it in. 

2) Nieces and Nephews are the reasons gift cards were invented. There is nothing more frustrating then spending $14 to ship a $7 play-doh factory to South Florida. 

3) All post office employees are trained in the same facility as Jason Bourne. They can make sh*t disappear ya'll... 

4) Every scale in every post office is exactly 1 lb. over every scale in the universe. 

Take my advice and always round up or you will be the one that holds up that line. 

5) A word problem: You go to the UPS Store at 9:15am and there are 2 employees working, both with customers and 2 people waiting in line to be helped. You are currently 3rd in line. How long will you wait? (Answer: 45 minutes) 

6) A word problem: You go to the Post Office at 9:15am and there are 2 employees working, both with customers and 14 people waiting in line to be helped. You are currently 15th in line. How long will you wait? (Answer: 45 minutes)

7) Tip your mailman during the holidays. I must admit, my local mail carrier has a superchill attitude and friendly disposition, but he's a rare gem. I often end up at different post offices in the area and the attitudes these folks have behind the counter is atrocious. However, thanks to Will Smith, we have uncovered the reason for this is because "Everyone who works in a post office is an alien". Noted. Thanks Will. 

8) We are required to kiss the asses of all postal workers during this time of year. Why, you ask? Remember: They know where we live ya'll - Just sayin'.